Sick of Online Dating Tips
Okay, I know, I’m setting myself up for annihilation here, and I’ve been guilty of writing them myself, but I have to tell you, I am so sick of online dating tips for this, online dating tips for that that I could SCREAM!!!! The thing is, the whole online dating shtick has become completely contrived, as in phony, fake, and let’s take a trip to Fantasy Island. Want to know what I’m talking about?
- It’s estimated that 90 % of online daters lie – everything from subtracting a few pounds, adding a few years, changing professions, or using a 10-year-old photo. I even know of one woman who uses a photo of her daughter and subtracts 25 years from her age.
- Online daters are pressured by business: That’s right – tips for photos, tips for makeup, tips for profiles, hire someone to take pro photos, pay someone to write a profile, and find someone to be your online dating strategist. Was dating like this back in 1954?
- Scammers abound: You almost have to be super-sleuth to ferret out the legit from the scammers, so why even put yourself in that position to begin with?
- Annoying administrative practices: Online dating sites have some very annoying practices such as requiring your credit card before allowing you a “free trial” which quickly turns into a “paid subscription” before you are able to find contact information to opt out.
- Values that suck: There is this new phrase:“Quick click.” What it refers to is that people going through online dating databases peruse candidates so quickly that they become “quick clickers,” and you become a “quick clicked” victim. What kind of human values does this demonstrate?
Okay, folks, I’m done grousing for now. I’ve got my armored vest on, so fire away!!
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Tags: online dating, sick, tips
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August 18th, 2008 at 3:29 am
MaryAnna,
I’m fascinated with the intensity of your convictions about online dating. We definitely have something in commmon…you wrote a book about it and I created a refreshing alternative to it. Actually we have a lot in common since I was married for 21 years with two children before becoming suddenly single.
I probably only dated a dozen women online, but only one of them looked like their photo. Then, right after one literally psycho date….whose photo also just happened to be 14 years old…I decided that there just had to be a better way for singles to use the Internet to their advantage.
The reason people can’t resist online dating is becasue it gives them the immediate satisfaction of taking control of their single lives. Someone breaks up with you and within hours you can be finding that person’s replacement…..and lo and behold, match.com still has your profile from two years ago ready and waiting! It’s probably a tougher habit to break than drug addication. So my goal was to deliver that same sense of immediate gratification without the downside of online dating.
It’s taken me 4 years to bring the concept to life and if you get a chance I would love to get your take on it at http://www.mixandmeet.com. We’re shooting for a soft launch here in Boston on August 28th. It’s pretty simple and focuses on spontaneously meeting a mixed group of people….at any time during the day, you can go online and let us know that you want to go out; at 4PM we tell you where you’re going and who you’re going to meet; and at 6PM you’re having happy hour drinks with five people you didn’t know yesterday at a bar near you. It only takes a couple of minutes and completely avoids the sore butt syndrome….no extensive profiles, no searching, and no emailing.
Cheers,
Bruce
p.s After 10 years of being single, I finally did meet my new wife at a black tie singles charity ball